Ferry across the….

Sometimes I think the slaves have really lost the plot. To get home from Dorset they chose the most strange of all beasts to get across the water….

I was not convinced by this at all….

especially when there are rumours out there, that I can not swim….

 

So while they were instagraming away, I was keeping my eye on the prize, the lifeboats….

 

Nothing to see here…..

The only way is Purbeck….

For once dear readers, I was not expected to work over the Easter weekend. I did ask the slaves if they were feeling alright, but a little jaunt to Dorset had been booked…..

 

For once we had a nice long lie in (every day is a lie in) before we set off for a little 14 mile hike up to see Harry and his rocks….

 

They insisted on a little break once we had walked from Corfe Castle to Old Harry to admire the view….

The slaves were struggling with the terrain but they only have one set of paws…

 

They really must learn how to keep up….

Sun, sea & sand….

Well angrily not that much sun, and there was a rather cruel wind…..

The slaves had also not bothered to check the tide times so there was very little sand too….

So we had to walk round the cliffs on the rather handy walkway…

 

They kept stopping to take pictures for their instagram feeds…..

Oh how I laughed when they got their feet wet…

Fools! I circled round and laughed in their face….

All this social media is so tiresome. The only instagram feed worth following is mine

 

Yawn…..

Raining cats & dogs…

Once again dear readers it was raining. Quelle surprise. I was dragged over to Kempton market for an early rummage….

 

I have to ask myself, did the raindrops on the window screen not give the game away?

 

Whatever the time/place I still look dashingly handsome….

 

Despite the rain coat, it was wet and freezing. I was not impressed.

 

This is all tat. Can we not leave? These traders have no staying power, they are worse than dachshunds. As soon as it started tipping down, they all packed their stuff away…

 

This really does bore me.

Road Trip….Part Two

Where the devil are we? My ears are picking up a different language. I don’t understand most of these humans. What dear readers is going on? Even the toilet spots are different….

 

I’m not going near that. It may bite. It’s like we are in a different country…..

 

Where are we? Does this mean to I need to learn another language? I’ve only just mastered English….

 

How am I supposed to control these people? I thought my dachshund death stare only worked on the English….You. Will. Obey. Me….

 

Parts of it look like England though…..

 

Hmmmm, I just can’t puzzle it out. Although I suspect I’m not in Kansas anymore…..

Road Trip….Part One

After a very hard christmas season, where I worked my dainty little paws to the bone, a road trip was planned. Now dear readers, this was to be no normal road trip. After a little tripet to the vets in Nov, I am now a very proud owner of a passport….

 

There were mutterings round the office prior to the trip about some of ‘us’ not travelling light and a big discussions as to what kind of vehicle was needed to fit all the luggage, but I tell you I was not the one bringing a very long and unwieldy bag with snowboards. No, I just had two homes, six friends, two suitcases, four blankets and two hot water bottles.

After a very rude awakening at 5am, first up was EuroTunnel, which is really very civilised. They have a lovely big park for us canines which we did not have to share with any small humans….

 

As it had been such an early start, we took a stroll round the park…

 

But we soon had to get back to the car and wait to get on the train….

 

Where are we going? Being a hound, I knew this was not a normal or usual route…..

The long and short of it……

When I heard we were off to The Longs Arm, I thought, how very dare you. I resent the implication and whatever I lack in stature I more than make up in personality…..

Are you calling me short?

 

The food better be good….

 

I couldn’t decide between the Venison or Beef…

 

Where is my food?

 

Are you planning to share any of that?

 

Beef. My favourite….

 

Selfishly I wasn’t given any. None, whatsoever. Not even a little carrot*….How could they resist me? Especially when I look so cute….

I was quite overcome with hunger, so had to have a little lie down.

Selfish humans.

*This may not be absolute truth, I may have been given one carrot, but I wanted the whole plate.

Soho lights….

I was invited along with my slaves to a little shindig in town, one Saturday evening; Soho, W1 to be precise. To the very civilised establishment The Crown and Two Chairmen where dogs are very welcome (along with humans, with a thirst for beer and deep pockets)

 

We were upstairs, which was a relief due to the masses on the ground floor. In area reserved solely for me

 

I soon made myself very comfortable….

 

I was greatly admired (of course) by all the party but I was only interested in what the staff were bringing to the table….

 

How kind…

 

Fried chicken. My absolute favourite.

 

The evening did start to drag for me once the food had cleared.

 

Till I had a word and made sure my staff ordered me my usual addison lee car to carry me safely home to my bed.

 

My preferred transportation method.

 

 

 

Badminton. It’s not just a game. Who knew?

This bank holiday weekend, saw me heading to my country retreat. It’s been such a busy year, this was the first opportunity since Christmas for me to escape the city and kick back in the country air. However on saturday I was informed that we were heading to Badminton to check it out, as ‘we’ are considering booking a stand their next year…..

 

There were some very large dogs eating grass outside of the house…..

 

It was dressage day. I could be a dressage dog, with moves like this….

 

There were some other very strange creatures walking around the tents…I’m not sure I cared for them.

 

However these animals did catch my eye and were at a very handy dachshund level which was rather fortunate….

 

I could definitely be an eventing contender…

 

It’s thirsty work in the sunshine.

 

Aren’t I Handsome?

Spring may be here….

Finally some sunshine to warm the bones. The sun gives me a skip to my step, a wag to my tail and a glint in my eye….

You will run with me….

I’m coming to get you….

It may be sunny, but it is still too cold to drop the coat…